Amazed

I know that God is sovereign. I know that He is loving. I know that He gives us what we need (though not always what we ask for). I know that He desires good for us. I know that He is just. I know that He is able to do far greater things than I could ever think or imagine… so why do I sometimes doubt Him?

Sometimes I pray a prayer for myself… to change my heart, to change my attitude, to give me opportunities to develop a specific fruit of the spirit, etc., yet I pray it with a hard heart, thinking “Sure, I ‘did my deed,’ I prayed to God about this so I can check it off my to-do list… like He’s ever going to be able to change me though… this is the way I am.” (Okay, maybe not those exact words, but you get what I mean). And then sure enough… God changes me.

I’m always amazed at how God can change hearts so quickly, and suddenly we’re passionate about what God is passionate about. Suddenly we’re obediently praying for, and loving and desiring things that only He could make us love and desire. Suddenly His plan for us (that we previously fought) is perfect.

I’ve been experiencing that wonder and amazement lately...amazed that God could change a heart like mine. Amazed that I’m no longer kicking and screaming, but loving…heck, embracing what God is asking of me. Amazed at how GOOD His plan is for me. Amazed at how blind I was to it before (and how ridiculously hard my heart was). Amazed at how He knew that one day I would submit to His sovereign plan after my major temper-tantrums. Amazed at how patient, loving, kind and merciful He is to give me more than I could ever want or need. Amazed at how He blesses me time and time again… simply amazed.

“You are God in Heaven

And here am I on earth

So I’ll let my words be few

Jesus, I am so in love with you

And I’ll stand in awe of you

Yes I’ll stand in awe of you

And I’ll let my words be few

Jesus I am so in love with you

The simplest of all loves songs

I long to bring to you

So Ill let my words be few

Jesus I am so in love with you”