Attitude & Heart's Posture

I had a friend recently tell me that I am probably one of the most gracious pregnant women she's known because I don't complain. What a sweet compliment; please let me dive into that a little deeper today....

I've learned a lot of things during pregnancy, such as, your body is no longer your own, suddenly you're talking about everything in weeks, your belly apparently wears a "public property, please touch me" sign, you have zero ab muscles to get out of bed in the morning, etc. However, one of the main things that I have learned is that pregnant women tend to commiserate over all the woes of pregnancy.

And I've learned that I am NOT one of those women that like to commiserate... period.

I don't mean to say that I'm not sympathetic towards others that are expecting, but often times, I think people simply COMPLAIN... about EVERYTHING. While there is a fine line between a simple statement to a whiny complaint, those whiny complaints are too much for me... especially when you hear nothing else but complaints come out of that person's mouth. Honestly, I just try to avoid those people because they are not enjoyable to be around!

Now, I must say that I have been beyond blessed. I had minimal morning sickness, which made teaching much easier than expected. I haven't had any leg cramps, major aches or pains, or been on bed rest. I don't have a toddler to chase after, I have a helper that comes to assist in the daily tasks of cooking and cleaning, and I have a supportive community of friends that visit or get me out of the apartment. I am blessed. But despite having these things and experiencing what I would probably consider an "easier" pregnancy, despite expecting twins, I really think it all comes down to my attitude and heart's posture.

I CHOOSE to be joyful despite any woes I may have.  I CHOOSE to thank God during the difficult and frustrating times. I CHOOSE to remember that children are a gift... and I get TWO sweet little ones!!! I CHOOSE to remember how many family and friends that Mike and I pray for each morning that want children so badly but instead have walked a difficult journey. I CHOOSE to be grateful. I CHOOSE to remember that 9 months is such a short period of time.

So when I hear the complaints, I sometimes just want to say, "Buck up, strap on your big girl pants, make a different choice, and change your heart's posture!"

I've been re-reading a book called, "Feminine Appeal: Seven Virtues of a Godly Wife and Mother" by Carolyn Mahaney. Yesterday, I read the chapter titled, "The Blessings of Loving my Children." Here are a few gold nugget quotes that I took from that chapter that I think really apply to not only having children, but expecting children too.

"Although many mothers are commited to caring sacrificially for their children, they sometimes neglect to enjoy them" p. 51

"We are to delight in our children." p. 51

"...we have a choice. We can either resent the challenges and demands that accompany motherhood and persist in our selfishness, or we can draw from God's grace and receive His help to cheerfully lay down our lives for our children." p. 53

"...as we set aside our own selfish desires and glorify God by joyfully serving our children, we are pursuing true greatness according to the Bible. Let us do so with tenderness, affection, and with a smile!" p. 53

"Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them" Psalms 127:3-5

So does that mean I NEVER complain? No. There are days/moments that are harder than others, but when I find myself in the middle of what could be a complaint instead of a statement, I choose to counteract it with joy...

It's not the most comfortable thing when Emma has her feet in her ribs and Owen kicks me in the pelvis or sinks so low that I can hardly walk... BUT I'm so grateful that they are growing and moving (and I CAN walk because I haven't been put on bed rest!) My fingers are swollen like sausages, arthritic feeling, and I have lost feeling in 7 of 10 of them, BUT I have a husband who massages them each morning so that I can better use them. I wake up about 10X a night to either use the bathroom or eat protein, BUT I know that it's preparing me for those late night/early morning feedings. I'm tired of eating protein and chewing all the time, BUT I have two 4 pound babies to brag about because I have been eating so well. I can't bend over very easily, so tasks like putting on underwear, a skirt, pants, picking up something I dropped on the floor are challenging and take me a really long time to do, BUT I can still do those tasks (and have a husband that helps me).

So what's your attitude and heart's posture when you walk through more difficult times? Are you choosing joy, or do you need to make some changes? Do people notice your joy and gratefulness or your complaints?